With pressure coming from all areas of life, from parents to school to social media, anxiety and depression is rising dramatically for teenagers. Privileged teens are among the most emotionally distressed youth in America, according to Arizona State University psychology professor Suniya Luthar. Principal Greg Louie, counselor Alinna Satake and Spanish teacher Bret Yeilding share some of the wisdom insights they have learned throughout their lives to help lessen students’ stress.
What would you like to tell students about school and grades?
Louie: Find balance. I know you guys are great students and you work your tails off and sacrifice sleep and eating healthy for extra activities and studying. Finding balance and prioritizing sleep is huge
Satake: [High school] too shall pass. It might feel really big when you're going through it, but when you're an adult, you won't remember what grade you got in what class or how close you were to the A- or the B+ or whatever the case may be. It’s going to be okay.
Yielding: Stop worrying so much about your grades. Be a spanish teacher — it’s a sexy life. On a more serious note, your grades will never define who you are as a person, and the fact that you don’t go to Harvard does not mean that you are going to be a failure.
What about about friendships and family?
Louie: Always give everyone the benefit of the doubt. Always assume best intentions. Exercise empathy and cherish the people in your life because you never know when they won’t be there.
Satake: Even if your parents frustrate you, they do that out of love. Having a balance between friends and families is very important, and so is cultivating relationships face to face — not just on Snapchat, but in real life.
Yielding: Nobody gets to the end of their life and says, “I wish I spent less time with my family and friends,” so work a little less, spend time with family and friends a little more. I think you’ll end up happier.
What advice would you give about dating (or just relationships in general)?
Louie: It’s super important to feel loved and express love but you are still learning who you are. To get so caught up in the affections of another you miss out on opportunities to figure out what you most appreciate about other people. My best advice would be don't be in a serious relationship until later in life, but spend time with people and find out the qualities you really appreciate about people.
Satake: Dating in high school is hard, because when you're a kid, your first love is your first love and there’s nothing quite like that. If you decide to pursue a relationship, be really thoughtful of what you're putting into that relationship.
Yielding: If you lie to people, you can’t be surprised when they are mad. You need to tell people the truth if you want them to tell you the truth.
What advice would you give about trying to be popular?
Louie: Don't worry about how other people perceive you. Be concerned about the person you see in the mirror and whether or not that person is proud of you.
Satake: All you really need is one person who will be your person. I would rather cultivate depth in a relationship, with a person who will always have your back.
Yielding: Popularity is out of your control, so just be nice to everybody. My advice would be just to live by the golden rule: Treat others like you want them to treat you.