Valentine’s Day comes with a lot of expectations — sometimes you just have to stand up and say, “Mom, quit asking me about my (nonexistent) love life! Please excuse me while I go up to my room and lament my misfortune.”

You lock the door and pick up that cheesy romance novel hidden under your pillow, because there is nothing like a fictional character’s love interest to help you get over the complete lack of interest coming your way.

“The Princess Bride” by William Goldman belongs under that pillow. You might have seen its movie adaptation, but it is supremely embarrassing to watch Princess Buttercup and Westley’s adventures while sobbing on your very public living room couch.

In the book, an unhappily betrothed Princess Buttercup is kidnapped by bandits. Buttercup’s young love, farmhand-turned-pirate Westley, must save her. Possibly one of the oldest yet still relevant love stories of today, “The Princess Bride” is a must read on this holiday.

But I believe a good love story needs a little more than romance, and while Westley’s superb fencing skills make for a great read, I prefer stories with higher body counts.

“The Winner’s Curse” by Marie Rutkovski has it all. In the book, a handsome slave catches the eye of Kestrel, the wealthy daughter of a respected general. Kestrel must eventually choose between the slave boy and her loyalty to her father, and later, between a fast-growing rebellion and her home country. Full of strategy and engaging characters, “The Winner’s Curse,” proves that nothing is fair in love and war.

And who can forget the tragic, beautiful story of Hazel Grace Lancaster and Augustus Waters? In “The Fault in Our Stars” by John Green, two cancer survivors meet and fall in love. If I say anything more, I might just start crying, so spare me the tears and grab a copy.

You see, books don’t care about your relationship status. They might make you cry and scream, but at least it won’t be over a breakup. Happy reading!