It’s fascinating how New Year’s Day ignites a nationwide desire for self-improvement each year.
On Dec. 31, we devour cookies and guzzle “100% natural” guava juice, and the next day, lettuce leaves seem to sprout from every bowl in the house.
Every Jan. 1, just like me, millions of people embrace the concept of a fresh start, as if the new year magically resets our lives and offers a clean slate to become better versions of ourselves (and who knows, maybe it does).
I, too, fell into this trap, believing that somehow 2024 would be different for me. I convinced myself that I would be one of the exceptions who actually stick to their resolutions, faithfully following through, every single day of the year.
Over the past year, I embarked on a journey of self-reflection through online journaling — as I did not have the patience to hand write the entries — a practice that I had heard so much about through Pinterest, but never fully embraced until now. What began as a casual attempt to document my thoughts soon evolved into a structured, daily approach to understanding my emotional landscape and having a reliable stress outlet.
At the beginning of the year, I developed a color-coding system, using a table on Google Docs to visually represent my daily experiences: green for great days filled with positivity and accomplishment; yellow for those average, mediocre days; red for the challenging times when everything seemed to go wrong; and blue for productive days. This simple yet effective method gave me a quick way to gauge my overall mood and experiences at a glance.
To complement this color system, I challenged myself to write a concise 100-word summary of each day. I also made it a point to identify three good things about each day, no matter how small or seemingly insignificant. This exercise in gratitude would theoretically force me to find the best parts even on the cloudiest of days, gradually training my mind to seek out positivity in any situation. Spoiler alert: The gratitude journaling didn’t work.
As I delved deeper into this journaling routine, I discovered its remarkable calming effect. It became my go-to coping mechanism, especially during sad or stressful days when my mind felt cluttered and overwhelmed, or sometimes when I really wanted to rant about this particularly annoying person.
After spending 10 months journaling, one of the most rewarding aspects of maintaining this journal has been the ability to look back and trace my personal evolution. It’s hilarious and honestly quite insightful to read entries from months ago and see how my perspectives on certain relationships and friendships — and even my view of activities such as robotics — have changed.
However, as with many well-intentioned habits, my dedication to journaling eventually hit a roadblock. As life got busier near finals and AP testing last semester, I could rarely find the time to write new entries — and as my days became more routine, I found myself struggling to find meaningful content. Gradually, the practice that had become such an integral part of my daily life started to slip away. Days turned into weeks, and before I knew it, my journal lay forgotten, collecting “dust” in my Google Drive.
Reflecting on this experience, I realize that my journaling journey mirrors the typical trajectory of most New Year’s resolutions. Each one starts with boundless energy and determination, fueled by the belief that this time will finally be different. We throw ourselves wholeheartedly into new habits or goals, riding high on the wave of motivation that comes with the promise of a new beginning.
But as the year progresses, that initial excitement begins to fade. The gym visits become less frequent, the healthy eating habits give way to old comforts (I just can’t let Safeway sugar cookies go) and the daily meditation sessions get squeezed out by pressing deadlines. I’m sure many can relate to this cycle of enthusiasm and forgetfulness. We’re all trying to better ourselves, to grow and evolve, yet we face similar challenges in maintaining long-term change.
As I look ahead to the coming year, I find myself once again drawn to the allure of New Year’s resolutions, but ONLY during the New Year and not any time before that. This time, however, armed with the insights gained from my journaling experience, I plan to approach resolutions differently. I want to be better at maintaining my journaling practice, but I also want to be realistic about the challenges I’ll face.
In 2025, I plan to find an accountability partner, someone who shares similar goals and can offer mutual support and encouragement. Sometimes, knowing that someone else is on the same journey can provide that extra push I need to stay on track.
I try to remind myself that the journey of self-improvement is not about perfection, but about progress. It’s about making small, consistent steps toward becoming the person we aspire to be. So here’s to another year of resolutions: of hopes and dreams; and of tries and retries.
