The Charcuterie Board Beatdown: which reporter will make the breaking board?

Photo by Neal Malhotra

The five contestants (left to right) — Derek Liang, Anika Kapasi, Beverly Xu, Kathy Wang and Tara Natarjan — line up behind their boards.

During a recent fourth-period class, Falcon staffers battled it out to see who could create the best charcuterie board. The five contestants — Derek Liang, Beverly Xu, Anika Kapasi, Kathy Wang and Tara Natarajan — had full creative freedom and were judged upon three different categories: presentation, creativity and taste. Each category was worth 10 points with a maximum point total of 30 points.

5. Derek Liang — “Classic Board”

Because I’ve always loved the flavors of traditional charcuterie boards, I decided to do a classic take on the charcuterie board with tiny changes. My board consisted of pita crackers, salami, pickles, cheddar cheese, grapes and brownies, totaling out to under twenty dollars.

I switched out the classic crackers for pita crackers for a better taste, added the pickles for a diversity in flavors with its sour note and added the brownies for a hint of sweetness to pair with the savory flavors surrounding it. 

In the process of making the board, unfortunately, I chose a wooden board that was too small. The lack of space on my board limited the artistic control I had over it, causing my design to look too tight with everything piled together.

To my dismay, even with my brownies on the board, my Neal score was a bit frowny (ahaha). Admittedly, the visual of my board was not the best — but the flavors were high quality and classic, which should have at least pushed my score to a passing C. 

I definitely underestimated the seriousness of this competition, but that won’t be happening again.

Judges’ Notes:

-Pickles + brownies = 🙁

-Rustic board looks good

-Brownie with apple + grape slaps

Final score: 19.5

4. Beverly Xu — “I put my heart on this chopping board” board

The last thing I want judges to feel when they see my charcuterie board is “board.” So I chose to create a cohesive, Valentines-themed board, featuring sweet and salty food combinations, with a few light and refreshing add-ins.

I first added a layer of popcorn — with chocolate drizzled on — then carved out hearts from wafers (they broke my heart whenever they broke) and roses from strawberries. To top it off (and show my infallible love for newspaper), I cut “NEWS” out of strawberry wafers. 

To add another layer of decadence, the chocolate wafers were dipped in chocolate, and a bowl of strawberry yogurt finished off the board.

Judges’ Notes: 

-Yoghurt ruins the cohesion

-News spelled and the flower roses get bonus points

-Chocolate syrup ties wafers and popcorn together

Final Score: 24

3. Anika Kapasi — “S’more than meets the eye” board

Inspired by the diverse spreads for “board nights” that I’ve seen on TikTok, I wanted to create something just as unique. I recall viewing a s’mores board while scrolling through my ForYou Page and added fruits — grapes, strawberries, raspberries, blueberries and blackberries — for a twist. 

Considering the mountains of chocolate and marshmallows that overflowed from the plate, the rainbow array of fruits helped make the board look a lot more vibrant, healthy and less like the taste-taster was going to get diabetes. 

I honestly had no expectations for how my board was going to turn out as I had never made one before. For $18, I think it definitely was a success even if my judges — *cough cough* Neal, Kavya, and Victoria — placed me third. Totally not salty about the loss by 0.5 points (I am).

Judges’ Notes:

-The s’more components blended very well

-Hershey was a nice touch

-Blackberries + marshmallows were surprisingly good, fruit didn’t taste sour 

Final Score: 25

2. Kathy Wang — “Not-so-basic” board:

After spending hours scrolling through charcuterie board ideas on Pinterest, I came across galleries of classical charcuterie boards filled with the typical assortments. Nothing seemed to catch my attention until I caught sight of something spectacular: a pristine rose constructed from slices of folded salami. 

After conducting some very serious research, I discovered a life hack on how to make a salami rose — you can layer and fold them onto the rim of an upside down cup. 

I ended up constructing a basic charcuterie board with cotton candy grapes, pretzels, cracker sheets, mozzarella cheese, ferrero rocher chocolate, apricot jam and of course, my finishing touch: the salami rose. 

Judging Notes:

-Didn’t like the box format but salami flower looks amazing

-Marmalade was amazing

-Unique ingredients were subtly addictive

Final Score: 25.5

1. Tara Natarajan — “I spent way too much money on this” board

In typical Tara fashion, I had forgotten about the contest until the day of and as a result, I found myself perusing the shelves of Safeway at the crack of dawn. I ended up buying multiple cured meats (prosciutto and three different types of salami), cheeses (brie, aged cheddar and provolone), spreads (fig, tangerine, raspberry and apricot jams) and toppers (olives, sweet peppers, and tomato basil dipping sauce). But something was missing — the board needed a main attraction. 

I decided to go overboard (literally) with a platter of deconstructed bruschetta, layering slices of vine-ripe tomatoes with fresh mozzarella and basil, topped with a sweet balsamic glaze. The experience taught me two things: One, I’m the GOAT. Two, sometimes, the best plan is no plan — my last-minute board beat the competition and I was rightfully crowned the Falcon’s charcuterie champion. 

Judges’ Notes:

-Looks like an expensive 5-course meal

-Wide variety of dips

-We ate A LOT

-Fancy sauces and jams elevate it

Final Score: 29