Older sisters guide the way

As time goes on, people change, and so did the relationship between my two older sisters and me. With the wide age gap of 9 and 12 years, we were not similar to most siblings. I was never compared to them because when my oldest sister went off to college, I was in kindergarten. It was my middle sister who faced the common hardships of comparison to a successful older sibling, which I never had to endure.

Before I could even walk or talk, Carolyn and Alison were motherly figures to me; always caring for me and giving me the attention my parents hardly provided due to their busy schedules and jobs. I spent most of my early childhood around them which greatly affected me and has molded my personality to who I am today. They always try to remind me that my parents are aging and to not trouble them due to the amount of stress they receive at work. Whenever I would whine and cry like most preschoolers, they would take me aside, emphasizing that my mom and dad did not need more stress at home because they have already dealt with too much during the day. These constant reminders taught me to be more mature at a younger age and to realize the importance of appreciating what my parents do for me.

As the youngest child, I would always be called the “baby” or “the most spoiled,” and I cannot admit that these are false statements. My parents learned from mistakes or regrets in parenthood from my two older sisters and applied the corrections onto me, hoping to give me the best opportunities I could possibly receive. Their hopes in me becoming a more well-rounded child resulted in me attending a private school until fifth grade. My sisters were very upset and did not agree with the idea of sending me to The Harker School. They spent years convincing  my parents to take me out of the school, and after elementary school, my parents finally agreed by transferring me to the middle school both my sisters used to attend, Redwood Middle School.  While changing to a new school with no one I knew, and coping with a completely different environment, many negative and positive experiences made an huge impact on me which still affect me to this very day. 

As time passed, the distance between all of us grew. At one point in time, we were all living in different cities across California and rarely communicated due to the amount of pressure from school and work. This was when our relationships started collapsing. Because we only saw each other three times a year during Thanksgiving, Christmas, and annual family vacations, our entire family’s relationships were affected negatively. 

In the fall of 2012, Alison, my middle sister, decided to join Carolyn, my oldest sister, in pursuing a full time job in the financial district of San Francisco, and this was when things started to look up. Since San Francisco was very close to home, they would visit for an entire weekend once a month, or my parents and I would drive up to San Francisco to see them. We would cherish the moments we spent together and value the conversations that we had with each other. The main difference from before was that we all started making an effort as all of us realized that our relationship as a family was not as strong as it was in the past. My family and I became aware that if we did not make an effort, we would see no difference in our relationships. As of today, my sisters still visit home at least once a month, and during the time away, we still try to keep great relationships with each other.

I have come to realize how much I value the company of my sisters and how they have molded me into becoming who I am today. Like most siblings, they can sometimes make my life miserable, but they have also created the memories that I cherish the most.  And for that, I thank them.