Cooking? You’ve guac to be kidding me

The day before my first real cooking experience, I had claimed a coupon at Chipotle for a free bag of chips and a side of guacamole. The thick green guacamole was delicious, a perfect combination of creaminess and saltiness.

When it comes to cooking, the most I’d ever done was to chop up a few onions or slice tomatoes for my mom, who did the actual cooking. Other than doing busy work or making cup noodles, which I recently discovered doesn’t count as cooking, I had never cooked a real meal by myself before.

When I was at Chipotle, I had no complaints because the guacamole didn’t cost me a penny, but I realized afterward that I would normally never pay the extra $2 for such a small portion. So to avoid the extra cost, I attempted to make some on my own.

My goal was to replicate Chipotle’s oh-so-tasty guacamole recipe. Luckily, the chain has uploaded the recipe to its website, so at that point, I knew all the necessary ingredients.

One Sunday night, I went down to the kitchen at 7 p.m. and asked my mom, who was already busy cooking steaks, if I could cook something of my own. She agreed to supply me with the few ingredients that I needed: avocados, onions, lemons and cilantro.

I set one rule for myself, which was that I couldn’t ask anyone for help. But as soon as my mom left, I realized I already had a problem: How could I get the soft avocado out of its hard, bumpy skin?

Looking for a solution, I went online and found a cooking blog called “Culinary Hill,” whose instructions guided me through most of the recipe. To remove the insides of the avocado, I cut the fruit in half and watched as the brown pit slid right out.

Then came the other ingredients: onions, lime juice and cilantro. Precise cutting was needed for the onions, since the pieces were supposed to be extremely small. For the lime juice, I substituted lemons instead, simply squeezing the juice into the bowl and throwing the rest of the lemon away.

Right as I thought everything was going quite smoothly,  I ran into a major problem — I couldn’t find the salt. I was forced to rummage through the kitchen and food supplies for nearly 20 minutes to find it.

After adding the salt, I realized that my guacamole looked watery and messy. The end result tasted nothing like Chipotle’s — it was a sour, unappetizing concoction.  Either I did something very wrong, or the recipe was a bad one. My guess: The problem was the cook.

Nonetheless, the experience gave me insight on how difficult preparing daily meals really can be. Although I do enjoy a challenge every once in awhile, cooking is one that will take time and practice to master.