“It’s OK, you can leave now,” they said to her mom. “You’ve put up an amazing fight, just please don’t suffer anymore.”
Her loved ones’ words thundered through Yasmeen Mardi’s mind like a continuous chant as she stumbled outside the church, sobs wracking through her tiny body.
At only 5 years old, Mardi had just begun to realize why she was sitting on the steps of a funeral hall, wearing an itchy, black dress. Her mom had passed away from liver cancer.
Now, 10 years later, as a sophomore, Mardi looks back on her short time with her mom as a reminder to be thankful for all she has now and to never take anything for granted.
“Others who have experienced losing a parent to an illness or tragedy understand how hard it is to talk about it, but I always find the good out of my time with [my mom],” Mardi said. “I think that her passing has taught me to be really strong and to stay positive. I always try to be happy, smiling and laughing, because it’s better to be remembered that way.”
Mardi’s mother was first diagnosed with liver cancer when Mardi was 4. According to her doctors, the cancer had started in the colon and spread to other parts of the body, causing extreme stomach pain. Mardi’s mom went through intense chemotherapy and radiation, sometimes even outside of the country, flying everywhere from Mexico to Canada.
At such a young age, Mardi didn’t understand what her mother was going through but remembered the distinct changes in her mom’s appearance.
“I just remember how thin my mom had become, and how she lost her hair, and how she would have to wear a mask sometimes so she wouldn't get sick from others,” she said. “Usually, while my parents were away, my brother and my cousins used to take care of my sister and [me], and I know it was really hard for them, given our young age.”
However, in spite of desperate attempts to find new treatments and countless visits to doctors and locations, Mardi’s mother, Chris Casanova, passed away on March 13, 2004.
“I think the hardest part for me was the fact that I didn't actually realize she died,” Mardi said. “When she was sick, I remember her just being really happy because I think she didn't want me or my sister to be scared or sad. My mom didn't want us to remember her as sick and helpless, and that’s why I think I have so many good memories of her.”
She remembers singing to Celine Dion’s greatest hits with her mom and reading Dr. Seuss’s “Green Eggs and Ham.” Even now, Mardi often bakes her mom’s signature cheesecake with her older sister and dad.
“Now that I think about it, her passing has really shaped the way I am,” Mardi said. “When I first moved to Saratoga, I was very nervous because I didn't want to be different from all the little girls at school who had their moms and went to Girl Scouts and did things with their mothers that I couldn't do, but I made friends for a lifetime who are the best, that never judge me for my one less parent, and are actually proud of how far I’ve come.”
Her dad has also played a huge role in making sure Mardi never missed out on what it felt like to have a mom.
“My dad is honestly the best parent anyone could have,” Mardi said. “He cooked, cleaned, picked out my clothes, picked me up from school, helped with homework, watched all my plays and soccer games and protected my sister and [me] fiercely.”
Ultimately, Mardi has learned how to turn her mom’s passing into something that forever reminds her to be thankful.
“I feel like, now, I don't take much things for granted, and I try to live the best I can because that's what my mom did,” Mardi said. “I am thankful for the time I had with her, because she taught me to see the goodness in even the worst situations.”
Mardi also wants to continue in the steps of her mother and touch as many people as she can.
Mardi believes that there is more to life than “grades, the university you go to or status.”
“I think life is based on the impact you have on the world and how you will leave your footprint in the hearts of many people,” said Mardi. “That’s what my mom did, and that's what I plan to do with my life.”