If you asked me at 8 years old whether I deserved money for doing my chores, I would have said yes in a heartbeat. But, as I have grown older and started to feel more appreciation for my parents’ hard work, I don’t feel as much desire to be paid.
Children should let go of the expectation of being paid for chores as they grow up. Helping out around the house simply as a part of the family is a greater motivator to teach kids important skills and mindsets in all their future pursuits.
I say this from the perspective of an older sister with two younger brothers. When my parents are running errands or working, I take on the responsibility to take care of them. Although it can be tiresome, babysitting is the most rewarding chore because I feel that I am making a difference in my house. Compared to washing dishes or cleaning the tables, I feel a deeper sense of connection and personal responsibility to my family.
For a while, my mom agreed to pay me a measly dollar per hour for babysitting them. At first, I tried to maximize my profit by offering to babysit more — eventually, I realized that taking care of my younger brothers meant more than just gaining a bit of extra cash.
Like many things in life, breaking out of my comfort zone of “easy chores” allowed me to gain a more mature perspective on my role in the family. I remember the first time I had to change my little brother’s diaper because my parents weren’t home. As he fussed and cried, I got the baby wipes ready and put on a nose plug, realizing I had no other choice than to suck it up and change the diaper.
Doing chores out of necessity was my key perspective changer. Most kids might think that if they decide to not do their chores, their parents eventually will. However, I’ve realized it’s not the best way to live. For example, if the dishes pile up in the sink and I want to eat a snack, I need to use a clean plate. I think, “Why not wash all of the dishes? My parents will appreciate my help and I’ll have a clean plate to use.”
Now, I’ve started to chase a more emotional reward in doing chores as opposed to a monetary reward. I want to achieve the gratitude of my family members and form a relationship based on mutual trust and support. Getting paid to do chores would make me constantly think of the cash reward instead of personal gratification.
Similar to how a student learns better if they seek curiosity instead of a good grade, I prefer to help out around the house for the sake of others. Doing chores on my own volition is just the first step of having responsibility for my future as I step out of high school.