Unpopular Opinions: Comic Sans is the font of gods

By far the best life tip I have ever given: Write all essays in Comic Sans. The calming, casual script font will evoke memories of happier times for whoever is grading.

Of course, this use alone is short-sighted and limited. The real power of Comic Sans only reveals itself when you truly embrace it.

Start by changing all the text around you to Comic Sans. That poster on the wall? Reprint it in Comic Sans. The pictures you send in Snapchat? Slather them in Comic Sans. The Supreme logo on your shirt? You know what to do.

You will notice the results immediately. Your mind will enter a permanent calmness as the harmless letters work their magic. Your friends will abandon you. It is OK. You do not need them. You have Comic Sans.