Top 10 ways to ghost 👻

May 1, 2023 — by Sam Bai and Victoria Lin
Graphic by Victoria Lin
For both in real life and online.

10. Be(e) Busy 

Fill your schedule with busy work so you literally do not have time to talk to said person. Be the busy bee that you were born to be. 

9. Block them on social media

It will take them a long time before they figure out you blocked them, but once they figure it out, you can just say you’re taking a break (not from social media, but from them). 

8. Talk to the hand

Best if you raise your hand in the middle of their sentence rather than the beginning or the end for maximum effect. 

7. Read a book 

Revert back to the ways of the olden days. Books act as a paper face shield against unwanted conversation. 

6. Join track 

What better way to deal with uncomfortable situations than to run away from your problems? Do note that this would give you another set of problems, however.

5. Become one with nature

No phones, no problems — only touching grass and seeing the sun.

4. Wall of separation 

I will Make Saratoga Great Again and build a great big wall (with my homework, textbooks, and computer) and make my friends pay for it. 

3. Dodge them IRL

Press d key to flash, only useful for League of Legend players, though we’re not sure if you have anyone to ghost if you’re a league player. 

2. Forget to text back 

My bad, I have a memory of a goldfish and forgot to text you back even though you saw me online. That was just a glitch. 

1. Bad Wifi 

Oh sorry, my WiFi just cut out cuz of the horrible storm we had 3 months ago.