Top 10 ways to celebrate finishing college apps

January 24, 2021 — by Rohan Kumar and Alan Zu
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Graphic by Rohan Kumar

10. Eat more. You may have been stress eating late-night instant noodles for the past few months, but nothing can compare to stuffing yourself full of poke that you finally have time to buy.

9.  Play some video games. An unhealthy addiction to “League of Legends” or “Genshin Impact” is an unavoidable symptom of senioritis.

8.  Don’t. After all, APs are coming up. And college decisions.

7.  Read a book. And no, the book you read to put in your Columbia essays doesn’t count.

6.  Start a YouTube channel. Start making cash for overreacting to your college decisions. It’s a lucrative industry.

5.  Party with friends. Oh right, college apps may no longer exist, but quarantine does.

4.  Go watch some TV. To be fair, you were probably already watching the “Mandalorian” instead of writing your essays.

3.  Worry about them. Your chances of getting in are proportional to how much you stress about admissions officers reading your corny conclusion paragraphs.

2.  Get a girlfriend. You’ll have to move fast since once colleges reject you, she probably will too.

1.  Get some sleep. You were probably one of the record 1,035 people who submitted Common App in the minute before the deadline on Jan. 1.