Holiday baking: easy as pie?

The first things you see when you walk into Safeway are shelves lined with pies, apple tarts and other delectable pastries, the trademarks of a successful holiday meal. Inspired by the approaching holidays, we decided to attempt baking our own Thanksgiving desserts.

We put the power of the pumpkin pie recipes from Francesca’s neighbor, Betty Crocker, and Libby’s to the test, and armed with measuring cups and whisks, we battled for the title of Best Pumpkin Pie Baker.

Francesca:

Equipped with my neighbor’s never-failing pumpkin pie recipe and a suspicious can of “shortening” (I still have no idea what that is), I set out to bake the world’s finest pie. But in the first 5 seconds of the pie making process, I had already made a fatal mistake. The water pitcher slipped out of my grasp, drowning the flour in water, and from there it just continued  going downhill.

Eventually, I gave up on following the recipe measurements and started dumping random amounts of ingredients into the soggy mixture.  My final product, a hodgepodge of wet flour, raw crusts and spilled ingredients, lacked the proper taste of a pumpkin pie. When I took the first bite, I cringed at the overpowering spicy taste of nutmeg and ginger. However, to my surprise, my pie was the most aesthetically appealing.

Amy:

I sort of cheated by buying pre-made crust, but hey, it technically wasn’t against the rules. As for the pie’s ingredients, I precisely measured them out and felt confident as I mixed the ingredients.

However, I soon realized with a heavy heart that I had been adding the ingredients in the order that they were listed on the recipe, instead of the order listed in the directions. The eggs were supposed to be beaten, but I haphazardly tossed them in at the end.

When it came time to bake the pies, I decided to leave it  in the oven longer because when we took all the pies out after 45 minutes, it looked even more raw than Francesca’s.

PSA: If you eat too much of Francesca’s pie, you might get salmonella.

Sadly, we became sidetracked with playing Mario Kart and Just Dance while waiting for the pies to cook, and by the time we finished our dance-off, which I won, my crust was severely burned.

The previously aesthetic, pre-made Safeway crust was now 50 shades darker than any pie crust should be. The crust’s texture was akin to poorly made armor: some parts were dented, some areas were completely missing and the entire thing tasted like charred metal.

Ashley:

I started the cook-off with flour, sugar, salt, some water, pumpkin puree and evaporated milk. Because of my poor measuring skills, I ended up with a weak, crumbly crust that looked like dried Play-doh. However, because I didn’t want my pie crust to turn out watery and flimsy like Francesca’s, I stuck with the recipe and didn’t add extra ingredients.

My pie filling was the pride and joy of my entire baking career. Because I was the only one smart enough out of the three of us to beat the eggs before mixing in the other ingredients, my pie ended up actually tasting like a pie. The only mistake I made was tasting the pie right after I took it out of the oven.

Originally, the recipe called for the pie to chill in the fridge for at least two hours before eating. Within a few seconds of the first bite, I thought my taste buds must have been malfunctioning. Needless to say, I have definitely learned my lesson.

We brought the pies to school and asked four people to taste and rank the pies. To prevent bias, the pies were labeled “1,” “2” and “3,” being Ashley’s, Francesca’s and Amy’s, respectively.

The answers were overwhelmingly, “Not ‘2.’” Two people chose “1” and two chose “3.”

Francesca, in denial, protested the loss of her pie, emphasizing the fact that hers looked the most aesthetically pleasing. However, all three eventually agreed that Amy’s and Ashley’s pies were the two victors.

From now on, Francesca is banned from the kitchen.