Ila Rao

My sister and I celebrate our first day of high school over dinner at Shadowbrook.

It’s no question that high school can feel overwhelming, between crowded events, heavy workloads and the stress of constant comparisons. For many students, these challenges are faced alone. But luckily, I have my twin sister, Ira, by my side — and that changes everything.

Countless times in middle school, I would find myself at school events, socials and parties where I didn’t know a single person. When my friends couldn’t make it, I’d usually just end up sitting around, bored without company in these events. It was even harder in 6th grade, when my sister and I were new to the district. 

Walking into high school, where everyone already had their own friend groups and clubs was honestly intimidating. I remember hearing kids talk about people I didn’t even know — leaving me feeling completely left out. The sole thing that made it less scary was having my twin with me; at least I wasn’t facing it alone.

I’m often met with pressure from academics, and sometimes they’re too much to handle by myself. Having a twin means that we share classes, assignments and deadlines. I remember the dozens of times I’ve had to frantically finish my math homework at lunch before the bell. It was chaotic, but with Ira’s help, I didn’t need to turn in a blank paper; I have always been able to rely on her for this. 

In middle school, I used to play Gimkit with my sister and our friends in the library, laughing as we tried to win games in an effort to prepare for tests. Those experiences turned me and my sister into students actually somewhat interested in studying. They gave me a convenient study partner who knows exactly what I’m dealing with because she’s dealing with it too.

Sometimes, though, I’m compared to my twin sister. The first time I joined cross country in 6th grade, I was behind my faster sister, feeling exhausted. When we entered a poetry competition in middle school, she won a prize and I didn’t. Though I was happy for her, on the inside, I still felt jealous — I used to wonder how she was always faster and better. 

Now, that same feeling of competition fuels me to push through till the end; overall, I feel much more motivated to get things done. 

Unlike most pairs of siblings, where an age gap leads to all sorts of disagreements, my twin sister understands exactly what I’m experiencing. When we show up at school events without any familiar faces, we’re never alone. I get to laugh, talk and hang out with my sister who’s going through high school right alongside me. 

Being a twin means I don’t just have a sibling at school — I have someone who’s always been on the same wavelength, in the same places, at the same time.